發(fā)布時間:2022-07-12 17:43:23來源:魔方格
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教師節(jié),是教師的神圣節(jié)日,在不同的國家有著不同的慶祝方式。第一個教師節(jié)是由葡萄牙于1899年設(shè)立的,距今已有115年的歷史。
Teacher: How can you tell a hawk has good eyesight?
老師:為什么說鷹的視力很好?
Student: Because I have never seen a hawk wearing spectacles.
學(xué)生:因?yàn)槲覐臎]見過哪只鷹戴眼鏡。
Teacher: Where does God live?
老師:上帝住哪兒?
Student: I think he lives in our bathroom.
學(xué)生:我想他應(yīng)該住我家浴室。
Teacher: Why do you say that?
老師:為什么這么說?
Student: Well, every morning my daddy bangs on the door and says, "God, are you still in there?"
學(xué)生:因?yàn)槊刻煸缟衔野侄济颓迷∈业拇箝T喊:“上帝啊,你怎么還在里面?”
Teacher: How can you make so many mistakes in just one day?
老師:為什么你一天里能犯那么多錯!
Pupil: I get up early!
學(xué)生:誰讓我起得早呢!
Teacher: What are some products of the West Indies?
老師:西印度群島有哪些產(chǎn)物?
Student: I don"t know.
學(xué)生:我不曉得。
Teacher: Of course, you do. Where do you get sugar from?
老師:怎么會不知道,你每天吃的糖哪兒來的?
Student: We borrow it from our neighbor.
學(xué)生:鄰居家借的。
Teacher: This is the fifth time this week that I have had punished you. What do you want to say?
老師:這已經(jīng)是我本周第五次罰你了。想說點(diǎn)什么?
Student: Thank god Saturday and Sunday are holidays, Sir!
學(xué)生:還好禮拜六禮拜天不上課啊老師!
相關(guān)文章拓展閱讀:死而復(fù)生的兔子
This guy comes home from work one day to find his dog with the neighbors pet rabbit in his mouth. The rabbit is dead and the guy panics. He thinks the neighbors are going to hate him forever, so he takes the dirty, chewed up rabbit into the house and gives it a bath, blow dries its fur and puts the rabbit back into the cage at the neighbors house, hoping they will think it died of natural causes.
A few days later, the neighbor is outside and asks the guy, "Did you hear that Fluffy died?" The guy stammers(口吃,結(jié)巴) and says, "Um...no...um...what happened?" The neighbor replies, "We just found him dead in his cage one day, but the weird thing is that the day after we buried him we went outside and someone had dug him up, gave him a bath and put him back into the cage. There must be some real sick people out there!"
一天一個人下班回家,發(fā)現(xiàn)他的狗嘴里叼著鄰居的寵物兔。兔子死了,這個人很驚慌。他想鄰居一定會責(zé)備他的。于是他打掃了現(xiàn)場,把兔子拖進(jìn)屋,給它洗了個澡,吹干兔毛。再把兔子放回鄰居家的兔籠,希望他們以為兔子是自然死亡的。
幾天后,鄰居在外面問這個人,“你知道Fluffy死了嗎?”這個人覺得很尷尬,假裝清白說到:“嗯,呃,沒有,怎么了?”鄰居說,“我們有一天發(fā)現(xiàn)它死在籠子里了。但奇怪的是,在我們埋葬它的第二天,有人把它挖出來了,洗了個澡,又放回了它的籠子。這附近一定有一個很神經(jīng)的人?!?br>